ffs

No seriously. For fuck sakes.

There's this girl: G. I know her because she dated my housemate C. He took her virginity. He also cheated on her and didn't care. Now I should be on her side, right? Bro's before Ho's? (He being the Ho.)

But she lost my respect, and the house's respect, because she lost herself to C, with seemingly no invitation or coercion on his part. In fact her clingy, simpering, whining, insecure, fawning, cutesy and totally dependent personality overhaul made his life miserable (she let her jealousies, insecurities and neediness show).

Now they've been apart for a year. And I recently bumped into her at another friend and ex-housemate's dinner. She wept (a lot). She said she broke up with him not because he cheated on her but because he doesn't 'know himself'... the him she knows being a wonderful person he has lost but which she maintains is the 'real him'.

So, her thesis: she knows him better than he knows himself and, it was implied, one day that 'real him' is going to raise a head, realise how right she was AND that he is hopelessly in love with her, and come back to her. As she wept she claimed that although she loves him deeply she is not in love with him anymore. What. Utter. Bullshit. Where does she get this cliched shit? Daytime radio psychology chat shows? The inside of gum wrappers?

Now whyyyyy am I being a bitch about this poor girl? Because - foul of all foul things - she reminds me of... me. So sad. Pathetic. Believing that I know whatshisface better than he knows himself. If he acts like he doesn't care: he doesn't care. Duh.

So, yeah, I'm still mad as hell with myself, had a baaaaaad food day. (Do not go food shopping you dumbass bitch! really!? you make your own life so hard!) purged twice although I didn't binge in the true sense of the word.

I'll try be good tomorrow. Promise. Weight: still 62. 16 days to loose 4 kilograms? Shit. Balls. M'fuck.