tum-ti-tum-tum

Haters gonna hate.
But
I <3 Felice.

She's just so gorgeous.
-
ate:
about 3 dessert spoons cooked oats
half green apple
2 rice cakes
1 coke light
a tomato
8 cucumber crudites
binge: fish-toast-mayonnaise-cheese-tomato-salt-pepper-peanutbutter-honey-toast
-peanutbutter-honey-toast-peanutbutter-honey-toast-
butter-butter-butter-butter-
brownie-brownie
milkshake-milkshake:
purge
-
yes i realise the insane binging is a problem
and yes
that was all 'one binge' i ate all that food in about 15-20 mins
yes i wanted to do it
no i did not enjoy it
yes sometimes it did taste good
yes i was so full i was in pain
but i'm grieving and i can't deal with trying to fix too much right now
hopefully i can remain in control tomorrow
-
no more eating today
only gum and coffee
-
tomorrow i would be really grateful
if i were able to
come home
and not binge
really really grateful
if i could manage
really really
-
i know you think i'm in control of it
no
i'm not
-
love to you, dear reader
x