striving

striving
to end the binging
to start restricting again
to get back to 58
as fast as I can
so that the real work can begin
to be horrifyingly thin
death-defyingly small
desperately thin
mortifyingly small
ridiculously
meaninglessly endlessly tiny
focus on
skin
body
water
sleep
being as vegan as possible
restricting
fighting hunger
but celebrating it too
ah
i feel gargantuan
it is so woeful
i like my breasts
that's all
but other than them
it shan't do
shan't
can't
won't
will not
refuse
the number must get smaller
never bigger
work work work
thin thin thin
hunger hunger hunger
water water water
love